HOLY FUCKING HELL.
After all that hubalaboo, she’s still alive?!
It ain’t right, man. It ain’t.
White woman keepin’ us down, yo.
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And I just want to comment, why is her face a different color from her neck?
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Thanks to Karlo, Pinoyblogero for the update.
This made my day a little better and eased my tensions.
Dear Ms. Uneditedmara,Lowe, Inc. is currently looking for Copywriters and Sr. Copywriters. We are interested in your profile this we would like to process you for an interview. Should you be interested, kindly send your updated CV in this email address.
Thank you.
Kind regards,
Some woman from Lowe HR
Lowe address that I will prolly obsess over
Lowe number that I will have memorized by the end of this sentence
***
To understand my dilemma, you have to know the story. It’s not that complicated, I just make it to be.
I like advertising. I might even say that I love it. Though the talent for it, I’m not so sure I have. People tell me I do and sometimes I see flashes of brilliance, but that’s about it. No substantial or empirical evidence that I DO have the talent to compel me to move on this track. It didn’t help that I only lasted 6 months on the first advertising job that I took. For so many reasons, laziness, fear, anxiety, self-doubt, office politics, shaky working conditions, etc. that job just didn’t fall through. They asked me to resign so I could save face. It was one of the toughest 15 minutes I had to deal with in my whole life. It was also one of the harshest breakups I’ve ever had. To love something and not have it love you back because you weren’t good enough. OUCH.
But now, I’m here. In this office, in this place, with this work, that does not leave much room to flex your creativity or climb up the corporate ladder but it’s something stable and safe. I know I can do this and no boss or superior or megalomaniac is going to tell me how to do my job. I am my own captain and my time is mine. The deadlines that are set are set by me. I am a big fish in a small pond, and that suits me just fine.
But now, Lowe comes a’callin’. AB Comm did a couple of months ago and my excuse for them was pregnancy. Now what? Family life? Reprioritized living? Sheer terror of getting back on the horse? This could be opportunity knocking for the second time. But what if I find out that I really just actually suck? That I have no strong work ethic? Or that I do not “work well with others”?
And I wish I knew what the pay would be like. Because the pay here is shite. But the “benefits” and working environment is to my liking. Like I said, I’d rather be the big fish in the small pond. I don’t think my ego can handle being a newbie again. That experience is just too scarring especially when you don’t know anyone there or when you’re in an industry that thrives in little white (and some times just blatant) lies.
And I can’t do the whole office politics. Because I think that bosses and managers are dumb shits. The only reason that they’re in a position to boss you around is because a) they got there first, b) they fucked someone on the way to the top to expedite things and c) because they know how to pain the walls bullshit and call it THEIR art. Don’t get me wrong, I have respect for the higher ups of the old skool generation. But these days, getting promoted just means that you’re a dickwad and you brown nose like you live off their asses.
Yes, I do need to work on my pride a tad and my attitude could use a little tweaking and I don’t think that my brazen approach to things is going to help me transition well, if I ever did decide to move, which, might I just remind you, a decision that still has to undergo endless hours of talking and analysis and dissection and emotional drama with a smattering of tears and frustrations and abundant moments of emo-ness.
Lord help us all.
This time, someone actually had the gall to write their thoughts down and get published.
Hello, Ms. Malu Fernandez.
Dear readers, you do not know her? Well .. let’s read what she has to say:
However I forgot that the hub was in Dubai and the majority of the OFWs (overseas Filipino workers) were stationed there. The duty-free shop was overrun with Filipino workers selling cell phones and perfume. Meanwhile, I wanted to slash my wrist at the thought of being trapped in a plane with all of them.
While I was on the plane (where the seats were so small I had bruises on my legs), my only consolation was the entertainment on the small flat screen in front of me. But it was busted, so I heaved a sigh, popped my sleeping pills and dozed off to the sounds of gum chewing and endless yelling of “HOY! Kumusta ka na? At taga sann ka? Domestic helper ka rin ba?” Translation: “Hey there? Where are you from? Are you a domestic helper as well?” I though I had died and God had sent me to my very own private hell.
On my way back, I had to bravely take the economy flight once more. This time I had already resigned myself to being trapped like a sardine in a sardine can with all these OFWs smelling of AXE and Charlie cologne while Jo Malone evaporated into thin air.
OH. NO. YOU. DI’INT.
Scanned pages of the article: PAGE 1. PAGE 2.
Did that sufficiently get your blood boiling? Maybe her follow-up article will convey her thoughts more thoroughly.
Just recently, I wrote a funny article in my magazine column and my friends thought it was hilarious. It was humorous and quite tongue-in-cheek, or at least I thought so, until the magazine got a few e-mails from people who didn’t get the meaning of my acerbic wit.
Now I seriously ask you, am I being a diva or are people around me just lacking in common sense? Perhaps it’s a little of both!
The entire second article HERE.
Did that sound like an apology to you? Yeah, me neither. Oh, Malu. How you assume that people don’t get your wit. We get your wit. But not your weight. What is up with that? Put down that doughnut this instant. Please. Because you’re just propagating the notion that you eat your emotions. Malu, brain function is not an emotion. Blinking is not an emotion. Stop eating every goddamned thing you see. I’m kinda sad for you because .. no, wait. I’m not. You got an education didn’t you? And you certainly make people think that you have the breeding. So you’re supposed to know how to use your brain. But since you wanted to shake things up, you chose not to and just ran your mouth instead. You know what I want to do to people like you? I like to tie them down on a table and slowly insert a rag into their mouth with the aid of water. I’d like to do this until I’ve sufficiently stuffed that rag down their throat and into their stomach. And then when I think I’m in far enough, I suddenly yank the rag out with one swift move. This will effectively take out your intestines faster than you can say “extra fries.”
Of course you can just imagine that with her “acerbic wit” and that fabulous heart attack waiting to happen, people were all up in arms. Bitch can’t possibly get away from a whole country unscathed when she’s published that piece of shit she calls an article. Who’s up for starting an angry mob, eh? You get the torches and I’ll bring the pitchforks. Malu definitely should rethink her choice of words .. or slimming pills that she’s taking. What could she possibly have gained by writing that horrid comment in between her article? I mean, we can do without the bigotry, Malu. Really. Especially coming from such a whore like yourself. I think we have all learned that when you’re hitting the size of a barge, you are in no position to belittle *snickers* other people. Yes. I’m discriminating against the fat fucks that think they’re the shit. Doesn’t mean you can stuff yourself until daybreak you can look down on others that don’t follow the year-long binge that you’re on. I’m sorry. The gravy train has left the station and is clearly headed for your midsection. All aboard to Fat Camp! Population 2. Fides and Malu. You sluts don’t deserve to live in the Philippines. Go. Flee. Rid us of the stench of your foul characters. Yes, people may bemoan the situation this country is in but we try not to destroy each other while we try to make things better. Thanks, fat fucks.
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Oh yeah. Let’s not forget the moronic editor who let this trash through. A POX! A POX UPON YOU AND YOUR HOUSEHOLD! You, sir should suck cock.
Oh yeah. We won. Drove that bitch right out.
Letters to the Editor
Statement from Malu Fernandez on the OFW controversyFriday, August 24, 2007
I am humbled by the vehement and heated response provoked by my
article entitled “From Boracay to Greece !” which came out in the June
2007 issue of People Asia. To say that this article was not meant to
malign, hurt or express prejudice against the OFWs now sounds hollow
after reading through all the blogs from Filipinos all over the world.
I am deeply apologetic for my insensitivity and the offensive manner
in which this article was written, I hear you all and I am properly
rebuked. IT was truly not my intention to malign hurt or express
prejudice against OFWs.As the recent recipient and target of death threats, hate blogs, and
deeply personal insults, I now truly understand the insidiousness of
discrimination and prejudice disguised as humor. Our society is bound
together by human chains of kindness and decency. I have failed to
observe this and I am now reaping the consequences of my actions. It
is my fervent hope that the lessons that I’ve learned are not lost on
all those who through anonymous blogs, engaged in bigotry,
discrimination, and hatred (against overweight individuals, for
example).I take full responsibility for my actions and my friends and family
have nothing to do with this. To date I have submitted my resignation
letters to both the Manila Standard and People Asia, on that note may
this matter be laid to rest.
Guess what I did after I saw this bad boy?
That’s right, baby.
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God. I need a fucking smoke.
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Already it’s starting to get hot in herrrrre ..
I’m a size 6 and don’t you forget it.
“I’ll get her.”
The three most beautiful words that I could ever hear.
Damn right.
We could all do with more flowers and less gross stories of how you once plucked this long a hair from your ass. Really, that does not get me in the mood for relations.
Ooooh! Can we buy double-sided tape? 
Can we? Can we? Huh? HUH?
*bounces up and down*
And for the love of God, FLUSH, damnit!
Let’s top that off with a yummy man-sicle. *slurp*
FACT.
Well .. no. I’m actually kind of ditsy but as of today, I’ve come this *_* this much closer to my receiving my Mensa membership. Mark this day, people! This is truly a momentous event and will surely never happen again.
Today is the day that I, uneditedmara, have single-handedly finished a crossword puzzle! And with the right answers too! (.. I think ..)
I’mma share with you my wizdums. 
Nevermind that it’s not the most recent.
The main thing is to keep in mind that I answered everything.
And reached my GOAL.
*snickers*
Get it? Goal? Goal.
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Does this mean that I can finally figger out what happened to my left sock?
I won’t bore you with the details and all that.
But if you insist, it’s HERE.
Let’s just ogle at how purdy it is.
Thanks to pogs, nouseforaname, and khalil for the tip!!!
It all started when bagsonmymind3 posted a blog entry venting about this pig girl that was criticizing her own country men’s products. As of this second, she has already deleted the entry as well as her account because a lot of Multiply users reacted to what she had written. Digital heckling is just as potent as a face-to-face encounter.
The controversial entry:
I go to Filipino stores here in Hawaii, but don’t really buy their products. Who want to use their skin whitening lotions and soaps?? Even their shampoo such as Palmolive Naturals and Sunsilk is so junk!haha… ..Their Pond’s moisturizing cream for the face doesn’t really work. Only FOBs use those products! I’m glad I don’t waste my money on Filipino products! I don’t know why celebrities use endorse their products. Another junk product is Eskinol which doesn’t really work. It doesn’t really make my pimples go away. I’m glad I don’t buy those anymore!!!
I rather be using products from here in the States which is much better. The sunblock here in the America is waaaaaay better! Another thing, I tried those “choknut” from the Filipino store, and it really sucks big time!!! I rather prefer chocolate like M&Ms, Twix, and Reeses Pieces. Even the chips taste so weird!!hehe…Doritos is much better!!haha….
“I wouldn’t buy any products from the Filipino store. Ewww!! “
And the author?
Ms. Fides Repugnant Repunte
All I can say is .. Thar she bloooooowwwssss!
Of course, after being flooded with more intelligent arguments, she deleted her entry and made a retraction. It goes:
Sorry for being the biggest loser!! I just didn’t know what to write about. I guess it brought everyone’s attention. I don’t mean to insult Filipino products. It’s just that the people around me like some friends I had made me influence them. Whatever that means! I do go to Filipino store here in Hawaii, but always feel like someone don’t want me there. Living in Hawaii is great, but I feel like I’m being monitored.
Filipino products is actually great like those skin whitening soaps. I mean who use those?? Most of you folks where right. I should just keep my mouth shut. SORRY FOR MY BEING STUPID!!! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!!
Hey, I grew up here in Hawaii. I can be such a bitch!!!
Sincerely,
THE BIGGEST LOSER!!!
I DON’T GIVE A FLYING FUCK. You’ve said all you wanted to say. An apology will only make me think less of you.
At this point, I was already in a blinding rage. I can understand that we may not be the best at making crap or obscenely cheap labor but I still take pride in the Filipino work ethic. And well, the fact that she is indio “part” Filipino enrages me. LOOK AT HER FOR FUCKS’ SAKE!!! She looks like she has 5 tubs of butter for lunch! And she dares call HER OWN FUCKING PEOPLE out?! It’s on now, biatch. You’re fat ass is no match for my Google-fu. You have crossed paths with a pathological stalker and I’m about to go Veronica Mars on your Beth Ditto-esque junk.
The Fides Files
Name: Fides Christine Regis Repunte
Age:27
Birthday: 20 February 1980
Birthplace: Davao City
Residence: Living in Hawaii
Interests: “lipglosses, lip balms, smell-good lotion, eating, watching movies, working out w/my TaeBo & Yoga(even if I’m feelin’ lazy), my iPod =) .. going to church, the Holy Bible.”
Occupation: Interviewer / Nurse’s aid / MODEL
But enough about that. What irks me is her blog entries from her Xanga blog. Of course she’s deleted that but that little bump didn’t stop me (much like her hitting 300lbs). Let’s take a gander, shall we?
Just because I’m Filipino, many people think that I have a Filipino name. I’d like to clarify to everyone that the meaning of “Fides” is a Latin/Spanish/French name, and NOT a Filipino name. “Fides” means “faithful.” I also live up to my name; I’m a Catholic, and NOT a born-again Christian. (Riiiiight.)
My newest trip nowadays is watching soaps at The Filipino Channel. My all-time favorite is Maging Sino Ka Man. Also, I like watching Maria Flordeluna. (Putangina jologs ka lang talaga.)
When I get involve in a relationship, I want my partner to have a strong personality like Sam Milby.
Why is it that I’m so shy to guys I’m attracted to???Hmmm….I just wanna smile! (HUWAAAAAAAAT?!)
GAH!
And she has an entry in her now deleted Multiply account that talks about her wanting to lose weight. That sent me into fits of laughter.
Damn….I feel so FAT!!! I need to loose weight! My ideal weight is to be 110. I can’t even fit most of the clothes in Everblue Casuals, or the dresses at Savers. hehehe….I hardly wear jeans anymore since my waistline is getting bigger. Actually, when I look at myself in the mirror or take a picture, I look pretty much average. Average as in not too fat & not too skinny! That’s good! I’m trying to avoid the fast-food, pastries, candies, and sodas. I wanna look good when I take studio pictures. Plus the fact, I wanna be the type I can FO SHOW myself to the world. And even to my partner. I miss wearing jeans. I try to drink lots of water instead of sodas. I do believe in the saying, “What you are is what you eat.” I’m actually petite. I don’t want to waste my money on going to the gym; I rather just do walking, and keep myself physically active. I miss my slim & slender body. My goal is NOT to be FAT!!!hehe……I’ll try! Actually, I can still eat anything I want just a little bit.
I love taking studio pictures!!! I feel like a model/actress.hehehe……..I miss going clubbing with some friends.
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! *pulls hair out* If you want to read what I’ve salvaged of her entries, go HERE. But I warn you, you may go bald.
And of course, the fact that set me over the edge, SHE MODELS. “She’s a model? NO WAI! Wai.” Well, she used to. And I think she’s just holding on to the “glory days”. You want to see?
She has the retarded sunflower hat as well. No need to be ashamed of the fashion choices we made in the yesteryears.
But wait, there’s more! Of course, being a *ahem* model, she has to have the obligatory, narcissistic studio pictures, doesn’t she? Ta-dah!
I just want to shout out to Fides that this is only the beginning. You mess with me, you mess with the World Wide Web. Oh yes. I need not call on my brass-knuckled buddies because as soon as my fingers touch that keyboard, I will have known that you are signed up and have a personal ad at MyDesiresearch or that you were once in a play (“It Can Happen To You”) about teen pregnancy, STD, HIV/AIDS prevention or that you went to Farrington Highschool in Honolulu and were there from 1994-1998 or that you used to have a Multiply account, crazybebelove. You better sleep with one eye open because the world is too small for your jiggly ass to hide.
I loathe people like you. People who think they’re so much better than their country men just because they’re living in the US. Nouveau riche. And what of the Tagalog teleseryes that you love so much, eh? You’re probably one of those people who faint at the mere sight of a matinee idol and work themselves to a frenzy. I’m also willing to bet my sweet, fine ass that you’re one to ask for seconds and thirds and fourths when you have pata for dinner. Or maybe there’s just one entire pig devoted solely for your meal. Wait, that’s an abomination. It’s like eating your young, isn’t it?
Thank you for the entertaining afternoon, Fides. I shall know the moment you touch down on Philippine soil and you can bet that I’ll be leading the pack and a hunting we will go.
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EDIT
Of course I just can’t let it go, can I? Nope.
FIDES is a Latin name…
Oooh…I have a classy & pretty name(as other people say) NO, YOU DON’T. IT SOUNDS LIKE IT’S FAT AND FARTS A LOT. To other Filipinos out there, my name is NOT a Filipino name. WOW! The name Fides actually means “faithful.” I’m really loving myself now. WE DON’T. I have to live up to my name. YOU CLEARLY AREN’T. I rather be religious than be a trashy whore! TOO LATE! ….My name is so beautiful. HUWAG KASING KUMONTRA EH. To be confident, I do consider myself pretty. YOU, AND ONLY YOU. I’m not getting any younger anymore; therefore, I’m a strong-willed woman. ANO RAW?!
I can’t wait for my trip to the Philippines this year; I wanna hit up the malls in Cebu & Davao. Maybe hit up the clubs there. MAYBE I’D HIT YOU OVER THE HEAD WITH A BAT.
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Thanks to pogs, nouseforaname, and khalil for the tip!
