Winter is coming

It’s a little more than 10 days until I leave for Spain. *cue shrieking and screaming* Thank God I’ve been so busy at work (and almost death-like at home) that I haven’t stressed out about the trip. UNTIL NOW.

Outfit that’s fabulous AND functional.
You can wear it to beheadings or while serving as the Hand of The King.

Don’t get me wrong, I AM BEYOND EXCITED at the prospect of finally going to Europe. And, it goes without saying, a little less excitement and a little more anxiety goes into meeting The Boyfriend’s family and friends. Eeep! Then there’s sheer dread at the thought of the excruciatingly cold weather that’s going to greet me. “It’s only 14 degrees! “, “It won’t be too bad”, and “It’s not *that* cold” are phrases that absolutely do not bring me any comfort.

It’s not THAT cold.

It’s not that I have to be where it’s cold. I was in New York in the dead of winter and I survived. The greater challenge and frustration is my tropical wardrobe. Yes, I have to face the fact that I, eventually have to purchase some coats, jackets, thermal underwear, headgear, and maybe some boots. But what do I wear between the thermal underwear and outerwear? The Boyfriend has advised me to “just layer and you’ll be fine.” Layer what exactly? Five shirts? My present wardrobe does not leave a lot of room for layering as there has never been a need for it. I can bundle up but I can also guarantee you that I’m going to look like a cottonball.

I’m in there somewhere.

I’m all warm and cozy by layering my shirt over my sweater over my jacket over my bra over my jumpsuit over my tanktop over my bolero over my ENTIREFREAKINCLOSET . But what if I have to take off my jacket and show myself to the world? WHAT THEN??

Layering. You’re doing it wrong.

What if I don’t have the luxury of hiding behind a heavy black coat? What if I have to go to somewhere fancier than fetching the newspaper from the porch? All of my formal clothes are breathable and thin! All of my shoes are strappy and open toed! Winter will fuck me!

“How mildly amusing that she thinks she’s going to get frostbite!” It’s not funny, people. I get cold when I’m sitting on the beach in the middle of summer. Cold is my kryptonite. *wails* To be honest, I just don’t want to look like a git all bundled up and looking like I don’t have any sense of fashion for a weather I’m totally unprepared for. :\

 

My alternative winter gear: A blanket

*sighs* I guess shopping is in order. But if you have any warm clothes, do send them my way. Do something nice this Christmas for a poor, unfortunate soul.

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