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Now that Schumi has retired from F1, what’s in store for him? You would want to see this. Even if you ARE a Kimi fan. Giggles all around.

Part1: Lollipop Man

Part 2: Store Display

Part3: Photo Op

Ferraris and Lions

There were only 2 things I was looking forward to last weekend, Schumi dominating in Japan and the England team climbing on top of their group at Old Trafford, none of which happened.

SUZUKA SUNDAY SIZZLER

Massa (Brazilian translation for I-got-beat-with-the-ugly-stick) polled at Suzuka with Schumi behind him and Fernando “Soul Patch” Alonso 4 places down. It looked like a sure win for the retiring German, when all of a sudden, his engine blows up. The last time that this happened was in 2000. 2000!!! IT’S A CONSPIRACY!!! The Ferrari engine is perfection and this happens NOW?! NOW THAT MICHAEL AND ALONSO ARE TIED FOR THE DRIVER’S SERIES?! I smell a rat. And it has white hairs. And it’s called Flavio Briatore.

Pre-Japan GP:

Michael Schumacher: 116 points

Fernando Alonso: 116 points

Post-Japan GP:

Fernando Alonso: 126 points

Michael Schumacher: 116 points

That means, Alonso has to NOT finish the FINAL GP in Brazil and Michael to win it. I volunteer myself to take out that ugly Spaniard. Somebody has to do the dirty work around here.

More reliable (and less psychotic recap of the Japan GP):

Schumacher blown engine changes F1 chase then Renault mocks Schumi

ENGLAND 0-0 MACEDONIA

And everyone thought this was going to be a piece of cake. The Macedonians didn’t exactly make it easy for England to try out their new formations. They were sticky suckers. I saw the frustration in everyone’s face, especially Stevie. I tried to telepathically tell him to calm down and be calculating rather than take on the Wazza-attitude, but he was just all over the place. He played Beck’s position and was tasked to protect Gary Neville at the right. But soon after the frustration set in, he went AWOL. And then he’s just pop out of the left, bringing the ball with him and setting up a shot that would be missed by his strikers. ARGH. I feel for you, Stevie. And because he never calmed down, at the end of 90minutes, he had no goals and a yellow card to show for all his efforts. Talk about disappointment.

If you want the bloody details, go over here.

Stevie’s sentiments.

“It’s disappointing to miss Wednesday,” Gerrard said. “I don’t think it was a booking. I’ve hit the woodwork four or five times this season and I need my luck to change.”

Stevie tackles Pandev ..

.. and is carded.

Of Football and F1

LIVERPOOL 3 – 2 GALATASARAY (Champions League)

True to his word, Benitez rotated his squad again, with the significant return to a central midfield role for captain Steven Gerrard.

Crouch: 9 and 52; Garcia: 14

BOLTON 2 – 0 LIVERPOOL (English Premiership League)

Benitez: “I’m not a manager who likes to talk and talk, I like to work and work. We are starting from now with the six players we have, but I expect those who’ve left for international duty to think a lot about what happened on Saturday and be ready to show a reaction when they come back in ten days.”

Stevie, clearly NOT happy with the results

Alonso polls at China Grand Prix but Schumi takes first ..

Michael Schumacher’s rain-defying victory in Shanghai on Sunday left German newspapers struggling to find enough superlatives after the seven-times champion moved to the top of the standings for the first time in two years.

“He showed the world who’s the best, cuts Alonso to shreds and shuts (Renault boss) Flavio Briatore’s trap.”

.. but Kimi didn’t even get to finish the goddamned race.

“That was a shame as it was looking like we could achieved a win today,” said Raikkonen.

“I don’t know exactly what happened, but all of a sudden the throttle didn’t react correctly and the engine went into safety mode and selected neutral.

Everyone’s fucking up. Gawd.

Me thinks it’s brought on by Milenyo. I feel like I’ve just entered the Twilight Zone. Everything is upside down this week.

*shrug*

*sigh*